Working on It?

BLAST FROM THE PAST (originally posted in 2006). Look how far he’s come!

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NEW YORK, New York — Reports are still sketchy about indie maverick Burnt Leader’s ability to post simple comments to Entertainment Geekly.

Most recent reports, taken from correspondence with the editors of EG, indicate that Mr. Leader is “working on” developing post material for the mid-May season. Some fans are skeptical that a post would ever be made, but those close to the source say it is not unusual for Mr. Leader’s “jury to still be out.”

Mr. Leader is not alone – it seems several of his cohorts, including fan-favorite MatthewBation, have also not made their presence known on the hot, new entertainment website. “It’s a learning curve,” said a close friend, “as most people are easily intimidated by HTML code and the prospect of taking a few seconds out of their daily grind to learn the new format.”

But those like Mr. Leader who continue to post email comments due to the simplicity of typing in an email window and clicking their send button have yet to understand that the process is equaly as simple when posting to a site like EG. Said Pepper McQui-Gon of the Los Angeles Institute for Posting Blogs, “It’s really no different. One simply logs onto the site as they would their email server, then opts to enter a new entry as one would enter a new email. They write a subject heading and then a body of their post, and click to send. Essentially it’s the same damn thing. I don’t know what these dorks think they need to do when they take several days to ‘work on’ the new process. What the hell is there to ‘work on?”

There are those that would defend people like Mr. Leader. Said Billy Bogface of some street corner, “Hey, leave him alone – the guy has a job, a life. Get off his back and let him figure it out on his own time.” But Fans are having none of it. “We love people like Mr. Leader,” said a girl with a syst, “And if we’re impatient with him it’s because we want him and his friends to be part of something wonderful. We don’t see why we should have to be patient when there is so little effort required on his part to join us in this digital sandbox. We don’t want any more lazy excuses. These people have begged for a forum for years, and now that it’s sitting in front of them they’re too intimidated to make the effort. Jesus people, get in the box! There are sand castles to be made!!”

Fans may never know if Mr. Leader or any of his cronies will ever make the leap to this new and elusive technology. And if so, will they ever learn the more daunting challenges of clicking to upload photos? We may never know the real answer. But one thing is for sure…

They are working on it.

Chuck Scatsters is a contributing editor and a frequent watcher of gaping anal porn

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